Saturday

Whoops, I said on Friday that I'd get back to the 15 minute thing on Saturday, and then I completely FORGOT! I did declutter one tiny little butterfly clip - you know, those hair clips that pinch together like butterfly wings. I had a Barbie-sized one, which I took to the lobby. Not sure anyone will be able to see it despite its being neon green, cuz it's soooo small. Oh, well.

Funny New Year's disaster story. I decided I wanted cheesecake last night, but I didn't have all the ingredients for the only recipe that required only one package of cream cheese (all I had). So I thought, no problem, I'll just substitute. They want saltines and walnuts for the crust, I'll use the pistachios I got for Christmas. They ask for blocks of chocolate, I'll use hot chocolate powder. They say to put vanilla in the hot fudge sauce that I'm not making? No problem, I'll just put it in the cheesecake.

Made the "crust" and it had too much butter and didn't really bake, but oh well. Mixed up the cheese, chocolate, etc., poured it in and set it to bake. Noticed there was a bit of smokiness from the oven, but couldn't figure out why. I hadn't spilled anything in there lately. Oh well. Cooked the thing an hour, let it sit in the oven to cool. It still wasn't set. Still sloshing around in the middle. I said whatever, I'm starving (it was around 9pm), and put the broiler on to cook a steak before putting the cake back in the oven. Five minutes later my apartment is filled with smoke. I turn off the broiler and then I'm like, crap, I've got to cover the smoke alarm before it goes off cuz it's SO LOUD. But with all that smoke it should have gone off by the time I covered it, so now I'm worried that it doesn't work.

I open the window next to the stove - by the way, it's about 20 degrees outside and the wind is howling by this point in the evening - and then crack open the door for a minute. Then I realize I can't stay in this apartment because I can't breathe. So I go after the cat, who is hiding out in the bedroom, because I don't want her to die of smoke inhalation. I grab her and take her out in the hall just after the hall smoke alarm goes off. Cat freaks out trying to get away from that horrible noise, and I'm trying to calm her down while I run down the stairs trying not to go deaf. A neighbor comes out and I explain it's my stove that's smoking. I open the window at the landing hoping to clear out the smoke. Alarm stops, smoke goes, then the window won't close. I had to get my neighbor out there again to close it cuz the whole building would be freezing if it stayed open all night.

After 20 minutes or so and several forays back into the apartment to open more windows and open the top window in the kitchen, it was finally breathable in there again. The indoor temp had dropped about four degrees too. The cat went straight under the bed for awhile - her favorite place to hide from loud noises. And I went to cook the other side of my steak on top of the stove. I had to move the liquid cheesecake aside, and when I did, guess what I discovered? A puddle of butter under the pan. The too-buttery "crust" had been leaking butter out of the pan to the bottom of the stove, where it burned slowly. When I put on the broiler, POOF! And smoke everywhere. DOHHHHHHHH!!!!

I did put the cake back in eventually, for another hour or so, at a higher temp, with a cookie sheet on the lower rack to catch the butter. It STILL wasn't fully cooked at 11:20, but I was so over it by then that I took a scoop of chocolately mush and ate it, and stuck the rest in the fridge. It's probably set by now. This much is sure: I won't be making any more cheesecake substitutions again soon.